Indulgences! Get 'Em While They're Hot!

If you want to do something to prove you love the earth, but your publicist couldn't get you into Vanity Fair's "green" issue and you'd rather hang yourself than watch "An Inconvenient Truth" again, iowahawk has an easy and reasonably priced solution for you:

This unique new system lets you, the average Joe planet rapist, cleanse your tortured psyche of the stain of enviro-guilt for as little as $9.95 per year! If enough of you follow this simple three step program, we can save the world for our children -- who will soon be frolicking with healthy polar bears atop Earth's reforested glaciers.

And to let the world know about your mad crush on Gaia, he also offers the form of emotional expression most favored by environmentalists: bumper stickers.